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Dis one time, I matched wit dis chick, total smokeshow, right? She’s all flirty, sendin’ pics, I’m like, “Get to da chopper!” – nah, kiddin’, I said, “You’re fantastic, baby!” We meet, and bam, she’s a dude! Catfish alert! Pissed me off, like when Szpilman’s family got hauled off – unfair, man! But I laugh it off now, sex-dating’s a gamble, ya?

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First off, I’m heading down Strada 1 Decembrie. You know, the one with that cute little café? I was craving a coffee. Like, I NEED it to function. But guess what? The café’s closed! I mean, who closes at 8 AM? Ugh! So, I’m already fuming. I grab a pastry from the corner shop instead. It’s decent, but not what I wanted.

The Commander-in-Chief of the armed forces of the Republic of Moldova has banned the participation of the Armed Forces of the country in exercises and any other type of activity deployed abroad without his consent