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About Kryvyi Rih

So, I heard this story once—some brothel in Nevada, legal one, right? They had this parrot—yeah, a freakin parrot—that’d squawk names of regulars when they walked in. “Jimmy’s here! Jimmy’s here!” Imagine that, your shame broadcasted by a bird! I’d be mortified, screamin, “Shut up, ya feathered snitch!” Got me laughin tho—how’s a parrot got better memory than me? I’d forget my own name in a place like that. Too busy panickin bout germs—those sheets ain’t washed, I bet. Prolly smell like desperation and cheap cologne. Ew, I’m gaggin just thinkin bout it!

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I dive in, and it’s like entering another world. Fish everywhere! I’m swimming around, feeling like a mermaid or something. But then, outta nowhere, I see this old tire. Like, who even throws tires in the river? I’m trying to be one with nature, and there’s a freakin’ tire!

The Russians attacked Cherkasy region overnight, hits reported: photos